Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Joy and Heartbreak

First the Joy....

Matt and JayDee just found out that they are having a BOY!! We are soooooo excited!!! I am crying with joy just thinking about having a little baby boy running around the house. They don't have a name for him yet but when they do, I know it will be perfect. The Doctor says he is a very active little boy and he gave them a run for their money when they were trying to see what sex he was. He is going to be just like his daddy... run...

Now the Heartbreak...

Last night as Evan and I were getting ready for bed, Cody was in the shower singing to the radio. When he got out of the shower he was a little teary eyed and he said that he was listening to the song "Christmas shoes" and it reminded him of what was happening in his own life and it made him cry.

It breaks our hearts to have to see him go through this. No one should ever have to lose their dad, their best friend, when they are still so young. He needs his dad. How do you help your son cope with this? How am I going to cope with this?


Anonymous said...

Oh, Julie, my heart bleeds for your pain. I am reminded of the words of Alma in the BOM - Alma 36:20 "And oh, what a joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!" What a blessing our Father has given to you to have a new little priesthood holder while at the same time you say goodbye to your sweetheart. Cody will have a hard time of it. You will have a hard time of it. But, you will probably both learn to cope with it in different ways. Embrace your grief. A mother's pain for the suffering of her son is intense. It is a burden that no mother should have to bear. Just be there for each other, pray together, and remind Cody of the Plan of Salvation and how he will see his dad again. Think often of the good memories that you have had together as a family, and make a lot more good memories now. I love you all dearly and pray always for you to have peace and comfort. Love, Mel

Kris said...

First, Congrats on finding our you'll be having a grandSON soon! I can only imagine how excited you'll all be! That little bundle of joy will keep you all on your toys for sure.

And as for your heartbreak; I'm so sorry you're finding yourselves on this path. I wish no one had to make this kind of journey. Being, almost, 5 months into losing Chris, I can tell you it's possible. It's not pleasant, actually - it's very difficult, but it's do-able. And I used to think Shane had it the worst - being only 3 - he'll have very few, if any, actual memories of his dad. And that is enough of a struggle for me. But perhaps it is worse when your child is aware of the situation, knows what is happening and knows what they are losing. I'm so sorry for all of you.

Enjoy the time you do have, and be grateful for it. A lot can happen in the coming years. A cure can be just around the corner. And in every situation someone HAS to beat the odds, there's no reason that can't be your family.

You're all in my thoughts, always, and I'm here to tell you that the impossible is possible.

Keep your chins up -

Thomas said...

Our thoughts and prayers are with you guys. Anna and I have been thinking of the fun times visiting with you and we still hope that we will be able to come over and see you all again. I can't imagine the pain that your family is going through at the moment but know that there are so many friends and family keeping you in thought and prayer on a constant basis.

Always thinking of you,

Thomas, Anna and Christian

Shauna said...

Our prayers are with your family. Life is just not fair sometimes. If you need anything, please let us know. We got your Christmas letter and picture. Thank you so much for thinking of us. We love and miss you guys.

Rana said...

Aunt Julie,

I'm sorry! It is so true the pain you must all be feeling.
At the same time I am so glad he realises, unlike many other boys and men I know~ the value of his Dad, that he Wants to be with him, and treasures his time with him. This might be a painful blessing, but a blessing none the less. But I am so sure you already knew that huh. :) I LOVE YOU!

Jules said...

Julie, it is impossible for any of us to know what you and Cody are feeling, but I too relate. In my own situation, we've decided that it is best as long as I am feeling well and am responding and haven't been told to contact hospice, then LIVE and don't think or talk about death. Don't say 2 to 4 years or 5-10 years. Just LIVE! Advances are being made daily. New drugs, treatments and practices are always being developed. Read your patriarchal blessing. Try not to think about what could happen, but live for now. My children don't know the full meaning of my diagnosis and I don't believe it would benefit them in any way. Anxiety and worry are too much for children. Try not to talk about the disease, diagnosis and future. Just enjoy now. I'm not saying bury your head in the sand, but be positive and prove the doctors wrong. LIVE LIVE LIVE.

Now, after telling you what I have chosen to do, however you, Evan and Cody need to cope and deal with the disease is right for you. I pray for your peace, I'll pray for Cody and the rest of your family. I try and recognize Heavenly Father's hand in my life everyday helping me keep a normal life for my family. I truly understand your pain and pray for each of you!

Love to each of you, Jules